“笑疯了，快偷一句分享给Ta”

家人们到点起床啦，一拳把自己打醒了。

来源xmjuZi.com

Guys, it's time to get up. I punched myself awake.

周五有多快乐呢，这么说吧，头不晕了，眼不花了，走路有劲了，开始生龙活虎。 xmJuzi.com

How happy is Friday? Well, let's put it this way. My head doesn't feel dizzy, my eyes don't blur, I walk with energy, and I become full of vitality. 本文来自小美句子

我不太会说迷人的话，但迷人的我正在和你说话。 来源xmjuzi.coM

I'm not very good at saying charming words, but the charming me is talking to you right now.

那天我用花洒打你的电话，你为什么不接。 来源XMJuzi.com

That day I tried to call you with the showerhead. Why didn't you answer? 来源xmjuzi.coM

17、岁：会出头的，27岁：挥锄头的。 内容来自xmjuzi

At 17: I'll make a name for myself. At 27: I'm swinging a hoe.

不要问我为什么不谈恋爱，你为什么不上清华，是你不想吗?

Don't ask me why I'm not in a relationship. Why don't you go to Tsinghua University? Don't you want to?

来源xmjuzI.com

别人琴棋书画样样精通，我就厉害了，我煎炒烹炸啥都吃。

Xmjuzi.com

Others are proficient in playing musical instruments, chess, calligraphy, and painting. I'm even more amazing. I can eat anything that's fried, stir - fried, cooked, or deep - fried. 本文来自小美句子

朋友说我再当舔狗就打断我的腿，还好是腿，是手的话就不能给你发消息了。 内容来自xmjuzi

My friend said that if I keep being a “bootlicker” in a relationship, he'll break my legs. Fortunately, it's the legs. If it were the hands, I wouldn't be able to send you messages.

内容来自xmjuzi

来源xmjuzi.coM

在劳动，躺在床上牢牢的一动不动的那种。

I'm “working”, the kind of “working” where I'm lying firmly in bed, not moving at all.

是不是去年我许愿时的声音太小了，我说的是财源滚滚，不是圆滚滚。 来源xmjuzi.com

Was my voice too low when I made a wish last year? I said I wanted money to roll in, not to become chubby. 内容来自xmjuzi